Thoughts of an Almost Traitor
by Estrelle Buscador
Summary: Raimundo knew that what he was doing was what was best for everyone - but that didn't make it any more pleasant or easy. Set during "Return of Master Monk Guan" when Rai appears to have turned to the Dark Side. One-shot.


This fanfiction takes place during the episode "Return of Master Monk Guan," where Raimundo pretends to be a traitor working for Hannibal Bean so that the monks can get the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman. I find any episode with Raimundo character development fascinating, and I couldn't resist the chance to get into his head and guess what he was thinking. I hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Xiaolin Showdown or any of its characters. Which was probably obvious.

* * *

Raimundo left the room where his friends were all chattering excitedly about the new training techniques Master Monk Guan must have in store for them, and walked outside. Stepping into the cool, still night, he shut the door behind him and looked up into the stars. He saw a tree near the temple door and made his way towards it, pressing his hand into the curves of the bark. It looked sturdy enough. With a movement so practiced it was nearly effortless, he summoned the wind beneath him and propelled himself into the air towards the nearest tree branch, getting just close enough so that both his hands could close around the limb. Raimundo then swung himself into the air and landed lightly on the branch, one leg folded against him, the other dangling over the branch. He felt the simply contented expression on his face grown into a smile, and leaned back into the trunk with a sigh. Much better.

He wasn't sure why exactly he felt so comfortable in trees. It probably had a lot to do with his childhood spent at the circus with his family. Since almost before he could walk, his parents had him training with them to be in their acrobatic act. Being in a tree was kind of like being on the high wire – just one thin rapport between you and the ground, and it was all about balance. Balance and confidence and concentration, although that last one could be difficult for him to master at times.

Rai closed his eyes and felt the wind he'd summoned dissipate around his face, blowing his hair into his eyes. He massaged his stomach appreciatively – that was one heck of a spread Master Monk Guan had set out. If he didn't know any better, he'd have though he had eaten twice as much food as he usually did, easy. But he did know better – while it probably looked like he had been piling away enough food for the next three days, he'd actually been eating less than usual, sneaking most of it beneath the table and hiding it away. There was no way he wanted to be going into the kind of training they were going to have tomorrow with a full stomach.

The other dragons' excited voices could be heard through the door of the temple, and Raimundo amusedly shook his head. _Those guys have no idea what we're in for tomorrow…_His eyes opened, and his smiles wilted into a worried frown. _Or what I'm going to do._ There were some parts of what he was going to do tomorrow that he was not looking forward to – and that didn't mean the intense training. _What are they going to think of me tomorrow? Shocked, disappointed, or unsurprised?_ All the possibilities seemed painful, but the last one stung the most. _What if that's what they've been expecting all along? You can never trust a traitor, after all._

He impatiently shoved the thoughts away. Painful or not, he had a job to do, and he was going to do it. He'd made a promise.

Rai hadn't known what to expect when Master Fung had called him into his private rooms. He'd just finished toweling off his hair, and was trying to figure out where to begin packing when he'd received the summons. He entered with a sense of trepidation – _I really, really shouldn't have called his proverbs "cheesy old sayings," although they totally are. But he already lectured me about that. Oh no – he couldn't have found out about the awesome prank I was going to pull on Clay – I __knew__ I should have hidden that dye better…_

But Master Fung didn't look like he usually did when he was about to launch into a lecture. Instead, he guided Rai to a chair in front of a laptop the monks had given him the Christmas before. Despite the very old-fashioned air Master Fung possessed, with a little tutoring from Kimiko he'd become a technological expert. In just a few minutes of fiddling with the webcam, the laptop screen lit up and Master Monk Guan's face appeared on the screen. Rai jumped up from his chair and the two bowed to each other.

The monk's request was simply stated: the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman needed to be back in the hands of good – their success depended on it. He and Master Fung had developed a plan, but they needed one of the dragons-in-training to pose as a traitor, seemingly join with Hannibal Bean, and get the Treasure back. They'd decided on Raimundo. They wanted someone crafty, someone cunning, someone –

"With previous experience?" Raimundo interjected in his usual cocky way, but both of the masters could see the internal wince at the back of his eyes.

The masters looked at each other. Master Monk Guan spoke, "I will not lie to you, that did figure briefly in our deliberations, but not as much as your other qualities. In short, we feel you are the best dragon for the job. We need your help."

Master Fung added, "Besides, we felt you might want to take this opportunity to make amends."

He'd jumped up hotly at that. "Make amends? I don't need to! I don't need to be going around begging people's forgiveness."

Master Fung raised an eyebrow. "True. Your friends forgave you long ago. But have you forgiven yourself?"

He'd been taken aback. Cut though the proverbs, and Master Fung could sure pack a punch. The truth was he still hadn't totally forgiven himself for that time when he'd sided with Wuya and turned his back on his friends. In fact, some nights when he couldn't fall asleep, those haunting memories would float in front of him: his friends' dismayed expressions, their pain-filled, true accusations, and the horrible moment when he thought he was going to see them crushed to death before his eyes. It would take a long time before he could forget the sorrow in their eyes, and even longer to forgive himself for being the cause of it. He had to do this – for Master Fung, for his friends, and for himself. Not to mention, it was pretty much his fault that the crummy bean got his hands on the Treasure in the first place. It was his responsibility to get it back.

"I'll do it."

Both of the masters looked pleased, and Master Monk Guan began to lay out the plan he'd formulated. He put it plainly and didn't offer many details, but that was fine with Rai. In his opinion, details usually just led to trouble – focus too much on the details and you can lose track of the goal. It was like the acrobat that had come to the circus for a time and tried to learn how to fly on the trapeze. He was so precise in his movements that he had to have everything just so. Problem was, by the time you'd jumped from the exact spot of the platform when the swing was the correct distance away and your feet were perfectly pointed, most of the time you'd forgotten to actually grab the trapeze and you were busy hoping that someone had tied the safety net securely. Rai liked it better the way he did it, by instinct. When the time felt right, you went for it and sometimes you fell, but most of the time it worked. So Rai would come to the temple, acting just as naïve as everyone else. He'd get beaten up by the training, be his hilarious self and get shot down several times, playing up the frustration in case Hannibal was watching. Then he'd finally get fed up and leave, becoming the perfect "pawn" for the evil bean.

When Raimundo had made it clear that he'd understood what he was supposed to do, Master Monk Guan had bowed to both of them. "Good day to you, Master Fung. I will see you soon, Raimundo, and good luck." And then the screen went black.

"Are you ready for this, young dragon?"

"Ready? I'm always ready to kick bean butt!"

"I have full confidence in you. But this will be a difficult mission, with some painful memories to relive. Do you feel prepared?"

He'd drawn himself up very seriously and looked his master straight in the eye. "I don't know. But I will see this mission through, and I will bring the Treasure back. I promise."

Master Fung smiled. "It is good to hear those brave words. I am already proud of you, Raimundo. Go and pack, quickly. Oh, and Raimundo," he added as Raimundo was almost out the door, "I found this in a tree outside." He held up the pink dye can. "I certainly hope our Texan friend was not about to have his favorite hat dyed pink – again."

"No, sir!" _Well, it sure wouldn't happen now that you have the dye._

"I'm glad to hear it. Just in case, I've told the paint companies not to sell anything else up here. Just in case." He twinkled, ever so slightly.

"Yes, sir." And he dashed out the door.

He closed his eyes again and leaned back against the tree. Just a few minutes more, and then he needed a quick briefing from Master Monk Guan about tomorrow. When he returned to his fellow dragons half an hour later with his pockets stuffed with food snuck from the kitchen, none of them would think anything of it; same old, carefree Raimundo up to his old tricks. No one would ever wonder how it took so long to pick up a few snacks. They wouldn't have a clue.

**···**

Raimundo stomped away for as long as he was in the other dragons' bewildered sight. When he was finally sure they could no longer see him, he sprinted for the rooms that had been set aside for him and quickly changed into his civilian clothes. Master Monk Guan had been positive that Hannibal had been watching the events of the day, and Rai wanted to have enough time to gather his bearings before the enemy made his move. He walked into the forest, just deep enough so that trees surrounded him on all sides, and sat on a fallen log. _Well, that was fun._

It wasn't the pain of which he was thinking, although the training had been – if anything – more painful than he was expecting. His arms, chest, and legs were aching. It wasn't even the looks of shock on his friends' faces as he'd stormed off. It was the name Master Monk Guan had called him.

_Bobo? Why the heck did he call me Bobo?_

He'd been expecting humiliation. He'd been expecting unfair treatment, yelling, and psychological torment. He had not been expecting something so…embarrassing. _I knew he would call me names – but I was planning on something else than that!_ Insolent boy, rebel scum, impudent swine, those names had at least some grimy respect to them. But Bobo? It made him sound like a little child. He was still fine on not knowing every detail of the scheme, but a little warning about that would have been nice.

On the other hand, the indignation and shock he'd felt when he first heard it was genuine, and it showed. It lent a degree of credibility to what he sometimes thought was an obviously transparent acting job. He was an acrobat and a warrior – he was not an actor. However, the act seemed to be working, if his friends' reactions were any indication. That was lucky; he himself could think of a couple slip-ups that he thought they were bound to catch. Especially…

-When Master Monk Guan had told him he could always "quit and leave." It had thrown Rai off. _Is that supposed to be a signal for me to leave now? But it seems way too early! Would they buy that I'd leave that quickly? What if I'm overthinking it? _Confusion must have unhinged him slightly, because the next thing he knew he was on his knees and reaching out beseechingly. "No! You don't understand! I've got no place to go!" And then he'd collapsed slightly as Master Monk Guan had walked "coldly" away. Most corny thing ever. He knew letting his sister make him watch those soap operas when he was little would come back to bite him. But they'd actually bought it, so maybe his acting wasn't as bad as he thought. They'd been so distracted by his distress, they hadn't realized how ridiculous he sounded. He had "no place to go"? How many times had he mentioned his huge family? How many presents had he received for Chinese New Year? He had plenty of people to go back to – not that he wanted to. His place was here. Or it would be again once the mission was over.

At least his cue to leave had been give to him at a good time. When he'd left the temple for real, it had been for selfish reasons. He didn't feel appreciated, and so he left. This time, he'd taken his leave when he thought that his friends were suffering because of him. He didn't look quite as much of a jerk that way, and hopefully they'd be a little more lenient when they found out the truth. If only he'd been that noble the first time he'd left…

There was a rustling in the trees nearby. Rai quieted his mind for a moment and listened. Could be Hannibal Roy Bean; he'd better get back into the angry stomping routine before he appeared. Now that the time had come that he would come face-to-face with the enemy, Rai had to admit that a little fear was pooling in his stomach. But he had a job to do, and he ignored it. The bean appeared before him, and Raimundo looked coolly up at him.

"I've been watching over you. Sorta like a guardian angel."

"That's creepy." _It is creepy. But it's also exactly what we expected you to do._ Rai smirked internally as he sensed Hannibal following him. _And bean boy, you just walked into our trap._

**···**

"Let's go! Xiaolin Showdown!"

They began to be lifted up above the ground. Raimundo looked down and saw that he was wearing his Shoku Warrior robes. _Oh great, isn't __that__ a dead giveaway?_ However, Omi didn't seem to notice anything strange about his clothes, and so things could proceed as they'd planned. In fact, everything was going smoothly. Master Monk Guan and Rai knew that if the monks get into a Xiaolin Showdown, that was all they would need to take Hannibal down. Rai had balanced all these ideas in his mind about how he would manage to grab the Shen Gong Wu at the same time as one of the others, but in the end he hadn't needed to use them. He and Omi had touched the bag of pilfered Wu at the exact same time, with what he might have once called a bizarre coincidence, but now would put down as destiny. He didn't believe much in that before, but way too much had happened that couldn't be coincidence – maybe it was all that prophecy talk he'd heard about in the temple that made him begin to believe in fate.

Master Fung had been right. Even though he knew that his "betrayal" was all an act, that he wasn't really on the side of evil, and that all would be well once the mission was over, it still hurt. It hurt to battle his friends and see the dismay on their faces. It hurt to see the trust they'd rebuilt for him visibly shatter in their eyes. It hurt to hear them try and reason with him when he knew they didn't need to. It hurt so badly he didn't trust himself to talk. So he'd kept his mouth shut and flailed out his best moves at an almost animal-like speed to try and keep up the façade.

He was very grateful to Master Monk Guan for stopping him before he got to Kimiko. It felt wrong to attack Clay and Omi, but to hit Kimiko that way seemed unthinkable. It wasn't that she was a girl – she could be tough as nails and hit hard; she was able to defend herself. It wasn't even that she was a friend and a fellow warrior. His feelings for Kimiko were so confused that he couldn't even figure them out for himself, let alone tell anyone. All he knew was that he couldn't attack her, and he was very glad that Master Monk Guan had somehow managed to figure that out and stopped Rai before he had to hit her.

And now, he was going to fight Omi. As much as he didn't like Omi thinking he was a traitor, he was kind of excited about getting to show them all what he could do when he really cut loose – especially Omi. He was capable of a lot more than ol' Chrome Dome gave him credit for.

Not that he didn't respect Omi – he did. Omi was a hard-core warrior and a steadfast friend. He had his lack of people skills and street smarts, but after living in a secluded area for all of his life that was to be expected. He could come across as conceited and at times his ego was even bigger than his head, but he didn't mean any harm. And while he occasionally was condescending – he and Rai were going to have a long talk about his affinity for the name Bobo – he rarely meant to be. Omi was someone you could trust, who cared about others, who tried to do what was right despite the consequences. He also strengthened, and depended on the strength of, his friends. Which might explain why he'd been so quiet since they'd declared the showdown.

But Omi, especially when Rai had turned down the promotion to Apprentice, had sometimes treated him like he was inferior. Not in his brains or his friendship, but in his strength. At times, it felt like Omi thought he needed coaching to get through his battles, or assistance to get through training. Rai knew Omi was trying to be helpful – most of the time, anyway – but it got downright annoying to be treated like a naïve kid. He had more strength from the other monks realized, and it was about time he used it. _We're still on the same side, Omi, but you're about to get a show you'll never forget._

He looked over at Omi, whose expression of determination seemed somewhat dulled by shock. It was interesting that the one who'd been the slowest to grasp the reality of Rai's real betrayal was the first to proclaim his fake one. Even now, he looked torn between wanting to do what he knew had to be done and running away so he wouldn't have to fight his friend. But he knew Omi would stay; when they both had a job, they stuck with it to the end. And they had to.

"Gong Yi Tampai!"

The battle began, Raimundo moving faster than even he knew he was capable of moving. _Make it look good, make it look good. Don't even think about how scummy you feel, it'll all be over soon. Move fast, be strong, show 'em all what you can do._

And then the timeout was called, Omi flopping about in the dragons' boat. Master Monk Guan wagered all their Shen Gong Wu in exchange for the Treasure of the Blind Swordsman, and Rai breathed an internal sigh of relief. _Almost done. One more move, and then we'll slap that smug smile off of Bean Boy's face._ Then he looked at Omi's face and his sudden cockiness crumbled. Omi looked bruised, battered, and totally dejected.

_Don't worry, Omi. In a few minutes you'll have won and this will all be over._

The bean was behind him. "…And make it sting."

"Oh, I'll make it sting, all right." _You'll see just how badly it stings in a sec._

He leapt to where Omi was waiting on the platform. It hurt to see Omi just barely holding back tears. He was glad that he had to focus on looking cruelly confident; it let him have less time to think about other things. _Just make the first move, Omi. Make the first move…_ Omi feebly lifted his arm, and that was all the opening Raimundo needed.

He'd thought that the "I got no place to go" spiel was corny. That was nothing compared to the act he was pulling now. He clutched his arm, his stomach, his chest, pretty much anything that didn't hurt, and stumbled around groaning. Then when he was right in front of Omi, he closed his eyes and fell backward. "Looks like you win." He grinned up at Omi, and held up a thumbs up.

The only thing that could possibly be sweeter than Omi's look of complete surprise was Hannibal Roy Bean's scream of outrage when he realized that he'd been had. Everything flashed around him, and Raimundo found himself back on the ground, standing beside Master Monk Guan as Omi stood nearby holding his winnings and looking like he still had no idea what was going on. Rai didn't feel any particular urge to rush over and explain, he just stood and watched Omi be congratulated. Even though he'd always been on the same side, it felt good to actually be standing among his allies. A good amount of explaining was probably going to have to happen soon, but for now he'd just savor their victory.

_It's good to be back._

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A/N: Well, there you are. Thanks for reading! Now, please press that button at the bottom and review this. Let me know what you think! Reviews make me happy :)


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